Here's what nobody tells you: nearly everyone hits a wall with sex at some point. Desire that's vanished, a body that won't play ball, sex that hurts, a confidence that's gone missing since - well, you know when. But because no one talks about it, you end up convinced you're the only one, sitting on it for years longer than you ever needed to. You don't have to. Most of this is far more workable than you'd think, and this is just a space to talk about it properly - no judgement, no cringing, no pretending everything's fine.
COSRT-accredited sex & relationship therapist · EMDR practitioner ·
Relationship Therapist of the Year 2024 · as seen on Channel 4
The Goal of Sex Therapy
Together, we'll work out what's getting in the way and start shifting it - so sex feels better, and so does the relationship around it. Whatever you're dealing with, you don't have to sort it on your own.
Issues I can assist with
In our sessions, I can support you with a variety of challenges, including:
Desire & arousal
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Low sexual desire and arousal difficulties
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Performance anxiety
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Anorgasmia
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Sexual aversion
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Refinding your sexual self after parenthood
Physical & pain
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Vaginismus
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Pelvic and vulva pain
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Erectile dysfunction
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Premature ejaculation
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Delayed ejaculation
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Sexual health concerns
Shame, trauma & confidence
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Sexual shame
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Sexual trauma
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Virginity or inexperience in later life
Identity & exploration
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Sexual orientation insecurities, including the ACE spectrum
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Insecurities around transitioning
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Exploring kinks and fetishes
When sex feels out of control
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Compulsive sexual behaviour
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Out-of-control sexual behaviour
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Chemsex
A Non-Shaming Approach
There's no judgement here, and nothing you say will shock me. We'll look at what's really driving these patterns - the feelings underneath them, what's going on in your life - and figure it out together, without you being made to feel like there's something wrong with you.
What actually shapes how you feel about sex
Sex is never just about sex. When we work together, I keep an eye on the whole picture - because desire and difficulty rarely come from one place.
Your body. Hormones, health, medication, a chronic condition, exhaustion - all of it can change desire, arousal or how sex feels. Sometimes what feels like a "me" problem is really your body flagging something.
What you were taught. Nobody arrives at adulthood with a blank slate. The messages you soaked up growing up - from family, school, mates, whatever you did or didn't see on a screen - shape what you expect from sex and how you feel when it doesn't match. Often we're carrying rules we never agreed to.
Where you come from. Culture, faith, the world you grew up in - they hand you ideas about what's "normal," what's allowed, what you're supposed to want. Some of that fits you. Some of it really doesn't, and part of the work is untangling which is which.
Whatever's going on, you don't have to have the words for it yet - that's what the first conversation is for. If you're ready, or even just curious, reach out.